Depression


I have always believed that you can fight anything if you have the will to do it. Last couple of weeks I guess, taught me otherwise and here’s how my belief changed – you can only fight something when the time is right, ‘coz only time can tell the moment when you will have the will to fight again.

What if you are lost, what if you have lost – lost to yourself, lost against the world and not just that – now you for sure know how beaten you really are. The magnitude, all of it, hits you in one conversation with your wife, on your bed when you have laid down for a good nights sleep and then BAM!!! – that’s when you lose it, lose your sleep, lose your calm and lose yourself between the whirlwind sounds of the world, and start to lose your hope!

You go to office again but aren’t smiling, aren’t cheerful, are angry and now don’t give a fuck to the reason that started it all. All you now care about is living your life no matter how miserable it feels. Go through the motions. It can’t get any shittier!

Happened to me. It was like a coma. I couldn’t even feel the air around me. Nothing refreshed me. Nothing eased me. I lived through it for 5 weeks – give and take hither and thither!

How do you come out of it? How do you wake up? I worked my ass off so I could forget it all.

What would you do?

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4 thoughts on “Depression”

  1. Depression tells people to close themselves off from everyone and everything, but that’s the exact opposite of what is needed. Possibly the hardest thing to do is to reach out a hand and say, “I need help.”

    Why?

    Because depression can drop some one so far down the hole that the only way out is by someone outside of the hole to help. But the person in the hole has got to make their predicament known which pain and pride can prevent.

    What is the answer then?

    Prayer. People. People sent to help in answer to prayer. Reaching out to people whether a friend or a professional. But the realization has to be made by the person suffering that others can and will help, if they know.

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    1. Well said! The point I found the most worrying though was that I couldn’t find the right people to talk to. I do agree that I did prefer not taking anyone’s help initially but then, my wife saw the in my eyes what no one else could, we had a fight and she made me realize that I hadn’t been honest to her about things that she never knew about since the last month. The very next day I could muster the guts to call her and tell her sorry about my behavior and that was it – the nail on the head!

      Thanks a ton for commenting! 🙂

      Like

  2. You can’t fight depression, but you can deal with the causes of it, thus healing it. That’s the tricky part. Identifying what the cause is.

    The only thing that worked for me, and I used to be a chronic depression sufferer, were the Bach Flower Remedies. As I said, though, the key is knowing which one to take, which means knowing what causes your depression.

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    1. Although I’m not a chronic sufferer of depression, I really do agree with you – identifying the cause was the best thing I could do during that time and as I said in my previous comment my wife was instrumental in making me realize my mistake!

      Thanks for commenting and visiting! 🙂

      Like

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