Choices


Ever felt like being stretched from your hands and legs, spread eagled in the air, helpless, caught by the people whom you so despise but you once trusted with all your heart? I think I’m going through a period when I’m now so used to this feeling that it feels more like an exercise. Everyday, I’m stretched painfully in either direction, emotionally. I have no clue when I’ll break but tension is high and I feel it in my veins. This isn’t normal – the way I’m trying to live, castrated by the things I’ve so loved. Brainwash seems imminent!

Anyways, that’s about me. Regarding this stretching, have you ever noticed how there’s always a power struggle between the ones who tend to take the middle path and the ones who don’t. Let’s call the former as ‘M’ for middle path and ‘B’ for clearly biased.

M’s, I think, are closer to attaining spiritual freedom, for they tend to keep their heads still, and always try to weigh the outcome of either of the choices. These are the people, whose focus is set at equality, and that they must never hurt anyone with their choices. They are often more articulate than most. These people tend to use a proper combination of heart and brain to weigh their options. These are also the people who’ll stay confused for far longer than most and don’t tend to come to conclusions until their set criteria is met.

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The B’s though, tend to think more from their heart than their minds. They have a tendency to start building an opinion after they have elected for an option which makes them rather more prejudiced and prone to making mistakes. These are also the people, more hasty and unclear in their thinking. Their world revolves more around showing off than actual reasoning. These often have high egos which further prohibits clear thinking. They are also the people who tend to disturb the M’s more than anyone else. These people think, since they’ve made their choices early, they’ve got to have materialistic evidence to support their argument and this is where M’s come in.

B’s invite M’s to their side by telling them how lucrative and correct their side/argument is. B’s in this sense are manipulative as well. In short, B’s are often better equipped to take the world head on than the M’s. M’s hence find it even harder to make their choices. M’s are far more influenced than B’s who don’t leave a room for any further influence on their decisions than their own.

My friend narrated me the story of some man in American continent, who used to answer every question using just his right index finger. There were several attempts to figure out what exactly he meant by that index finger. Was it one, solitary? It was hard to find. Even when dying, the answer to the question about his index finger was… ‘an index finger’. Few years later, a very intelligent version of the finger arrived, in that, he always meant that “All is One”. That with experience we learn to take the middle road to happiness, in that the happiness of polarity in decisions becomes immaterial. That after a point in life, that one point, all your choices are correct. You have attained what’s called Spiritual Nirvana.

My argument, for which he had no answer was, is as follows –

What if the entire thing of that one focal point, is an alibi to escape the logics of the world and avoid all further scrutiny, an escape route? Viewing it from a different angle isn’t that one focal point also a side that we’ve taken. Don’t M’s become the B’s then? Aren’t we all scared again and running away? Is Spiritual Nirvana a prejudice?

For a person who makes his choices carefully and after a lot of thought, it’s so slippery, this world! For one single slip of thought and you will end up making the wrong choice, and for all M’s, it’s a huge setback. For B’s though, this situation/condition never materializes for they’ve already made their choice and are more often than not, ready to live with the repercussions.

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I’ve made my choice and I am the middle-man, M.

What are you? M or B.

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15 thoughts on “Choices”

  1. I am the P (gods, it reads like pee, ain’t it?), this letter because I dont think I can find a better one.
    P for Pain. I am the person that puts herself in terrible situations so you don’t have to, not just by vicariously living through my expirience and not so I could provide you a safe ground or guidance, but because of the basis in which I believe that we all must embrace. We constantly change and ignore something that is there, we try to be above. Yet entropy is everything that remains.
    To give you an example of what I am talking about and which I hope will be sensible, I mourn people before they die.
    I dont think I fit as an M, also. I never take the middle way. I believe in the universal Black and White, based on individual empathical hurt (like for example, apple is healthy and good for me, but you are allergic to it, so you not eating it is good for you.)
    I dont think I fit a B either, because I put too much care in others surviving, perserved in their originality.
    So I guess I am the P, what do you think? 🙂

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  2. I’m definitely an ‘M’. I hate having to make decisions so I linger on the littlest things. There is a constant battle between my head and my heart so in the end no one is happy. The choice I’ve made is to try and think of me first. It is hard, but I’m trying.

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  3. It’s hard to make out what I am…maybe I am ‘U’ for Unsure…still. I’m pretty young to decide, so I’ll let you know in about ten years. 😉 Awesome post as usual, my friend!

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  4. Thank you for writing this deep thought provoking post.

    I can definitely relate to M.
    And I have to agree, living with B’s who see the world most of the times wearing biased shades have a tendency to annoy me especially when they make decisions or end arguments with ad hominem approaches and words.

    The intellectual side of my brain cringes when having to deal with the impulses and lack of empathy and regard for others around B’s.

    I’m not saying I’m a genius. Far from it. But I would definitely want a conversavtion or discussion to end on intellectual grounds.

    Thank you for voicing this out well.

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