WIFE – Views Splash!

Reward of Love

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Reward.”

This is my greatest reward. To place an unknown human being in my sphere of trust. To let her know she’ll never be alone again. The connection to Shiva though, is something only she can explain. 🙂

Hate is a strong word isn’t it? Especially when it comes to things you do or get done in a day. I hate none of what I do. I love my job. I like the people around me who work just like me. We have a fun time. I love my home or whatever of a ‘Home’ we’ve made it into. I love my dog. I love my wife and doing stuff for her.

The only thing that ails my soul and which I think is entirely a waste of my time (some may argue it isn’t) is driving to and fro my office. I feel that hour and a half is the least productive time in my day and the best period I can use for my writing if someone drives my vehicle. It isn’t fruitful to my health for all the smoke and dust that enters me, sticks to me, and makes me look like a villager on either end of the journeys. It doesn’t exercise a single muscle of my body and if anything raises my blood pressure.

And therefore, I want my robot to be a car that drives itself. I know they are still building on this technology and I may never be able to afford one for myself for it may never turn cheap and I know I’ll end up driving my car for my whole life whenever I own one, I want to nurture this dream. I know a lot of you may argue against me sleeping late and waking up late but because we’re talking solely about my comfort, this will be the pinnacle of the technology I wish to own.

The entire commute must get reduced to small phrases – “Driver, drive to my office” or “Driver, drive to my home”. Something voice activated and startable only using a password and it then does all the work itself while I commute hasslefree inside a clean cabin, undisturbed to write all I want. This way I’ll get a thousand other ideas to write about too by simply looking out of the window.

Some may argue, why not take a bus instead which will be cheaper? I say, I hate being around people. Crowd and bad smells simply tick me off. This when clearly, people are my best source of inspiration for thoughts and writing. Every living body feeds my brains with things and teaches me stuff that no books or internet can.

“Seeing is Believing“.

A Cooked Blog

Sometimes I wonder what attracts you more to me, a love for the unknown? A love for the hatred I have for the world? Curiosity for the time unknown? Unseen acts of horror, unprecedented valor, or kindness?

I feel you touch a piece of me everyday but never whole. The tingle that wakes up my sensations, often leaves my soul wanting for more. I get you one finger pore at a time and with each touch, the yearning for wholeness turns my skin inside out. Why can’t I have you more? Why don’t I get you more?

Can’t blame you though, my readers, for we are all travellers in the same boat. Kids, wife, parents, office, home, horrifying relatives, and time killing neighbors – they consume so much of our time and brain that there’s none left for us to use at the end of the day. Still we are motivated to do what’s right for us – write for ourselves, it’s an obligation to the inner you, isn’t it? You reach the desk at the last hour of the day, pick up your pieces of thoughts and right when you are about to hit the keyboard, you lose power. People with laptops can still work for a while but not desktop users like me. Our day just got pushed into a dark oblivion when there’s no option but to sleep, the thoughts still currying inside, the flavors dying to spill out on to a writing pad or a web page. But luck is having none of it!

I’ve been under such a spell since past 3 months. Everyday is a struggle – to stay awake, concentrate, be healthier, see certain things the way I would a few years ago, keep focus on the future all the while learning from the past and (the one that tops it off) yet, be fun.

My irritability around this time of the year isn’t a new phenomenon. From an early age, I found June, July, August and September – the hardest to deal with. Whether it be my bone crushing accidents, to hysteria among the people around me, diseases – it’s like a kill-switch turns on. People die, there are terrible news all around and concentrating is the last thing my brain does. This is also the time I wish, time should just fly by never concerning me with its nitty-gritty. These are easily the most non-productive months of my year. Do you have any months that particularly seem to concern you – ones that freeze your hands, swell your feet, numb your mind for the world around just picks up its frantic pace and tries to drag you with it?

It is these months though, I expect my dear readers to show me some love and be kind enough to keep this space engaged. And how well you’ve done it, BRAVO! You’ve read and read my stuff, appreciated it, hunted down my errors even when I wasn’t there for you…

“You Cooked My Blog“!

And now it’s time for me put some dishes on the front burner and stir the pot to see what comes out next.

Hope when WE met!

This one’s easy – it’s my wife!

I remember the restaurant

I remember the hue

I remember the dreamy silhouette that was you!

You appeared from the lights

And blew mine away.

All I saw was you

That smile in the fray.

We talked and talked

For hours and hours

Your career and mine

For an unsurpassable length of time.

Till we were caught dreaming

By our Dads screaming!

Riding the Tides

You know, there are things that we do over and over again for a considerable period of our life and then, someday we stop doing them, for whatever reasons. We never know if they were for good or bad, for they in their time never held any meaning. Then one day we stop doing them. All they give us are memories, some cherishable and some not so.

The one thing I’m doing ever since I learnt to control handles and balance, is ride. Ride, to and fro, carrying people at my back.

The 2-wheelers that I’ve used are –

1. BSA SLR – Bicycle.

2. Kinetic Luna Super Star – A bicycle with an engine, a clutch and accelerator.

3. Hero Puch Shakti 3G – A mini demon. The smallest geared bikes with the smallest of engines – a mere 65CC.

4. You’ve all already met my 4th companion, Bajaj Pulsar 180CC – One of the oldest and proudest giants in the history of Bajaj sporting bikes in India. Without it, I’m lost.

During my schooling and engineering, my brother rode as my pillion. They were fun times. Nothing except the rides changed over the years. From bicycle to Luna to Shakti, that part of our life is one the longest case of the association between brothers and their rides. We rode for long hours and I don’t remember him, even once, asking me to let him ride. He was happy and content, at the back, watching the world and giving all sorts of running commentary, describing the surroundings. Watching girls, eateries, escaping seniors, riding in the rain – through love and through fight, those days will forever remain fresh.

There was one instance when while returning from our school, it was raining really hard. I decided to have some fun and starting riding through puddles of rainwater, which soaked all of his shoes from the inside. I kept doing it, when in a fit, he opened his water bottle and emptied it straight into my shoes, and all this 60 kmph. We laughed all the way to our home. One of the happiest memories I have with him.

We’ve had our share of accidents as well, when in all the occasions, he jumped off well before the fate hit us. He is thankfully smart in those situations when I’m not. Twice in those accidents, I hair-cracked my left shoulder. But they never deterred me

Then my ride changed to Pulsar and the speed at which I normally rode changed. I remember once, when he was in Bangalore, spending time on bench in his company, I used to drop him to his office. We used to take the ‘Nice’ road. It was one clean and zero traffic road, 16 kms in length. We reached 120 kmph one day. He simply closed his eyes and felt the speed while I just enjoyed the fastest that I had ever ridden, things passing by me in time smaller than the blink of an eye. I miss those moments.

Then came my wife, and so changed my speed. All she ever has said about my riding is – “You are the only one with whom I don’t try to balance the bike”. I clearly am her favorite!

Riding is also the time, I think about my life the most. I contemplate all serious issues, when I’m seated on my bike. I have my commentary running for all that while. “Government must ban all women and old drivers”, “Why the fuck does everyone change their lines at the last moments”, “What happened to them indicators” yada yada.

And then there’s my favorite song by Joe Satriani – “Ride” – that defines some philosophies of my life –

This clearly is my favorite daily ritual!

Life Happened

AAAAANNNNDDDD We’re done! I just read the last post in my mail box and now I stand on top of every post all of you have published till yesterday. Man this is hard work.

The problem I started to face was the enormity of the task that it had become – reading your posts. It took me forever to complete it everyday, at least 4-5 hours everyday, hours I don’t normally have. A task made harder now that my wife has returned from her holidays, so no extra hours for she needs attention and so do I!

The tasks in the office also peaked to numbers unfathomable for single man to carry out. That meant longer hours at desk, and no reading or blogging there. Which in turn meant I had to catch up with everything and everyone in the meagre hours I have in the evenings – which with my pathetic internet connection is impossible.

6 posts in a week, from which 2 were reblogs. I had to start finding time for writing as well. And hence, started the filtering phase. I’d realized that not all the people who write everyday dedicated any kind of attention to me and I’ve been blindly following them for a long time for no results. So they had to go off from my mail box. And guess what – it took me an entire week to get this done. And now I see fewer posts in my mailbox, better posts from the people who seem to care about my kind of writing more than other lesser things. I know this may hurt others – well wait! Whom will it hurt? People that don’t anyways read my blog… well they can wait! 😀

For the rest of you, I can probably say – I’m Back and I can’t wait to start writing again!

Story Of My Life

Eyes open,

Gotten ready,

Breakfast Eaten,

Kiss given,

Bike ridden,

Mundane office,

Jokes galore,

Life’s a joke,

Bike ridden back,

Horn honked,

Dog barks,

Home again,

A smiling face,

Lush Lips,

Kiss taken,

Stories shared,

Hunger pangs,

Dinner is served,

Blogs begin,

Bed calls,

Fifty Words Story of my life!

————–*******————–

Bed Talks

What an apt day for this prompt! I was looking to vent out something that happened last night and here cometh the daily prompt!

Wifey left again to visit her parents and her in-laws (my parents) today. I’m alone for next 15 days again but we had a bedtime conversation going after a long time yesterday. Ever since she returned, she was puzzled by my new found love for writing. Actually she’s right to feel this way as nothing comes so easy to me. I procrastinate to levels not known to ordinary humans. I put things off simply because I don’t feel my toes are working perfectly (just a case in point).

We went out to dinner the night she returned, I bought her gifts and we started talking about her experience and when she paused for water, mine too! She had apparently been following my blog from where she was, had grown a bit fond of it. Not delving into how she fared during her vacation, I can tell you what she told me about the results of my break – “You’ve really chilled. You don’t look frazzled. There’s a calmness over you which is helping me wind down too!”.

Then last night, she told me about a demon that she’s been feeding for last 27 years. And I’m thinking how the hell did I miss this about her? Then again, life hasn’t been all hunky dory lately so missing a detail isn’t that big an issue for both of us! She told me how, she has always wanted to emulate a colonel friend of her grand father whom she met when she was just 3. She met him only 3-4 times but considered him as more of her grand father than her actual one (this must really hurt a soul I tell you) and all because he taught her how to carry herself and how to talk to others and things most parents miss these days (ironically her parents missed it too).

Now how does all this relate to today’s prompt? An artist, per me, is someone who elicits responses untold to many a soul themselves. He puts out something that prompts others to empty their own souls when all the while he is himself just emptying his own. Am I an artist?I’m no artist. For I’m no writer (I’m trying to be but am far far away from it), I’m no singer, I’m no player but yet I could, with my demeanor, elicit a response, a thought from my soul mate that she was prepared to hide until told otherwise. I felt proud. I had never had such a deep discussion with her, and she didn’t mind not sleeping at all last night, for she felt light!

Yes, writing is my art, not perfect yet but it’ll do till I can keep my soul mate honest and open with me. I can now see why she always pushed me to get into a different line along with my current industry. Something creative that brought out the good in me. She told me, the way I am today, I can never get someone to like me even if I wanted it the hardest. They’ll never understand me for I’ve built a fort around me and I don’t let anyone in. Trust me people – she’s made her way in already, she just doesn’t know it yet!

Let’s find out the arts of others –

Green Eyed Monster

Green Eyed Lady? Me? You? Who?

Damn, this prompt is so easy I’d have answered it in my sleep.

No man ever came close to making me think so. No woman except her ever could! Oh and how she makes you feel so miserable and on your knees all the time, you are crawling, crawling forever, with a craving the size of a dinosaur (or the largest mammal ever whoever that is, think it’s the blue whale) inside your heart. You owe your entire world to her when she hasn’t done anything but moved a tiny single grain of sand in your life. You still are what you forever were, just more miserable. You look like a fool, with that loser expression that says,”You ain’t worth a shit without her”! She turns you into that one “Green Eyed Monster“!

Yes, the one that gives me a green eye, the one, the only one that makes me think “I wish I was not me” is – my wife!

She has a way of living life that can make most husbands jealous and all of you gents (married or unmarried), you can say thanks to your dear lords that she isn’t your wife and all this misery was personally handed to me by her father!

She has a way of living life, way that I can only probably write about. I can always experience it from her but never live it myself, so pre-occupied with the shit of the world that I am. She is free in her head. No rules hold any meaning to her unless explained and she be satisfied. Rules bind her spirit. Rules kill her instinct. She learns like only she can.

I so wish I was her, free from the world. Living her own dream. The world works just for her making us her tools. Her notions are different. She is very emotional, but strong. I am emotional too but I just don’t know how to handle it, so I hide it, somewhere safe in the corner of my brain, so I never come across as weak. Only she knows it and my family too but I’m not too sure about them.

She has clarity in thoughts like a crystal, some of us only dream of having it. I just so wish I will someday explain my world to her, the way she has made hers, very evident! Till then, hell yeah and down right “JEALOUS”!

Welcome Back!

I’d always wondered how a canary would look like in my balcony? That wonderful friend who’d chirp with me every day tripping me into that joyful zone when I need it the most?

Yes, my canary returned to my balcony today. She’s free, singing, and even more wonderfully colorful. She’s dropped a lot of her emotional baggage. She’s totally made my day. I see her and I see light. She’s chirping better, loving better, laughing even better, and best of all looks prettier. The marks of stress have vanished, lost to the oceans and the harsh sun. I finally see fun and hell, feel it too.

The life’s returned and it’s refreshed.

Welcome back baby with those beaded and braided hair, tanned skin, that fresh Goan glow, and… and you’ve got no perfume on! Your smell has changed. You’ve thinned. You’ve done total justice to your vacation. You’ve proved me wrong. Oh how I doubted your ability to take care of yourself. I hail your spirit and will and promise to make things better – for us!

I love the way you’ve sorted yourself out, pinpointed your flaws and worked on them. You’ve gotten quieter, softer, and saner. You seem clearer in your head about what you want and how you want to get it, and hence, I’m finding my task easier. Trust me, it never has been.

Again, WELCOME BACK and now let’s get on to creating our own new horizon and a world to go with it with a renewed vigor!

Lets see what people think –

Mutts in Love

The mornings seem to last forever now. Never have I roamed around in my house, watched the dawn, and done things other than necessary. I miss it even when I live in it. It’s all a dream.

Each morning starts with my favorite silhouette at the door. The shadow of her hand slowly caressing my forehead to wake me up. I don’t. I can’t. I’m already awake. I see it happen. But then a snap and I smell lovely breakfast. 2 mutts madly in love with the same woman. She feeds them both. One leaves for office while the other stays wagging his tail.

Remembering the same unperturbed love, true to its center, when all beliefs made sense. The smell of the breakfast: breaking my fall into a mindless abyss, that smile: breaking my heart into a flutter, that kiss: the longest 30 seconds of my life (that I got everyday), that music: breaking my day into one fabulous song.

Wonderful memories and how they’re all turning true now. Life’s come a full circle!

Memories –

Us!

Who took this picture and when? Please do mind a taller grizzly bear beside an angel!

Should I Ask Her Out Again?

I dedicate this song to that string in every heart that plucks when something breath-taking passes by your eyes!

Don’t get hooked ‘coz the best is yet to come! 😀

I dedicate this song to my wife, for every once in a while I feel I should’ve grown up with her, known her, loved her from that very first sight and told her only when time was second perfect! Oh I wish! Man I’m so full of love tonight… it’s incredible!

Is the time right? Why am I so terrified and yet some chords are easing the breathing, should I ask her out again?

Love –

Bitten

Yeah I’m bitten. I have a secret love bug that bites my ass each time I see a beautiful woman. It’s true, so true that you can see me scratch a cheek that very moment – yeah yeah, that shy dirty way, swaying my head away so no one notices me! I have a nasty habit of staring at things that grab my attention and that includes women. I see them till I’ve noted everything. Nope not in a bad way at all, in fact, as my wife will tell you now, it’s in my nature to seek details – whichever sense they entail.

Homing in on 5 years of marriage and it still holds true. I’ve never stopped staring at women, I guess I never will. What has changed though, is the women don’t change now, they’re none but one, she’s the one and only one – my wife. She doesn’t mind me doing any of the rotten stuff that I do, except the real disgusting ones, for she is my center of attraction all the time and oh how she loves attention!

Not that I went anywhere but home when I was single, but then it was sheer habit. After marriage though, it isn’t any habit, but her that I come home for. Such is the hurry, colleagues hardly see me in office after 7. Straight, without a thought, at the gate, honk, shrek barks, and I see her as I enter my home, all fresh, smelling flowers or strawberries, turns all of that shitty day right around – trust me!

I’ve also noticed that I fall head over heels for women with power, in any form. And she’s nothing but power. Power to attract, power to charm, power to talk, power to love, power, power, power!

I’ll let you in on a secret, shhh, quiet down, yes you, the one munching, else she’ll hear me – I do really weird stuff to grab her attention. I think she doesn’t know it yet or she does and I’m the fool again, but the point is, I often throw tantrums just to grab her attention, her eyes as she walks by, as she cooks, as she watches TV.

I love you baby – although I have no clue what love is. I just hope it never changes!

Lets find who amore for whom –

To My Family!

I don’t think I need to tell anyone what denial is. I was in denial – all my life. I can safely say that I’m more than three-quarters through my life now and I have no one else than my family to thank. I don’t know what love is! I’ve never known love but I believe it’s a strange combination of respect, responsibility, care, and detailing. And I guess that’s what me and my family have. That cocktail of aforementioned ingredients that binds us.

The two late comers in our family, my wife and my brother’s wife, they were I think destined to share their lives with us. Now they are what me and brother are, to my parents. A simple enough structure, no joint family, phew! The kind of people we all are, only 2 out of 6 are extroverts – dad and my wife! The way we take care of each other is very unique – for me it is! But I feel all families are unique in their own little ways.

Just want to say – I love you all and be around like you always are. This bugger needs you sometimes – OK, all the time!

I’ll Take Care

So something authentic and mind churning came my way today in a text message –

“No matter where you come from and when you start, your dreams are valid“.

My wife sent it to me. She told me that she was well applauded for her quote and even received a gift! Congrats Baby!

She went on to ask me, what I think of it? I liked it!

I think it speaks tons of what’s in her mind and how dear are her dreams to her heart.

I’ll tell you a few things about her that are necessary to know her. She is a dreamer of course. If you’ll ask her what’s her greatest dream, she’ll say – I want to be famous. If you’ll ask her what does she think about money, she’ll say – I don’t need much (which sometimes can be very tricky to comprehend, mind you). 😉

Back to the dreams though, she really does want to be famous. She loves colors, hates routines, loves comfort, hates dullness. She is in fact so much like a kid, you can see her expression change when things are not going according to her and the smiling coming back, when things do. Her head turns away from anything she doesn’t like much. She’s full of energy when she gets to smile, laugh and spread some and yet has none that’s expendable, to perform mundane tasks at home.

For some reason, the exciting never escapes her. She has a nose for it and it gets very perilous sometimes. The sudden clicks in her head can get so unnerving, she gets very difficult to cope with.

None of these are problems, mind you! She is a human being. She loves fun and is very open about it. She has a very unique mind that just doesn’t accept haze, for haze handicaps her. She hates confusions, loves frank and open discussions and if she gets her mind at some task, you can rest assured, it will be done.

She wants to do so much and is always on a prowl to do something unique. She’s brilliant at getting things done. She loves everyone and everything till they give her a reason for the otherwise.

I believe if I ask her what are your plans for later, she’ll reply –

“I want to continue with fashion. I want to indulge in social work. I want to start writing my book (that she plans to publish in 5 years). I want switch to a new house. I want to earn more. I want to move out of Delhi”.

If you eavesdrop on some of her client calls, all talks are big and about the ginormous steps towards the unthinkable. I’ve heard so many of her calls, and each one has one thing in common – she’ll always make sure that you are never at the losing end.

There are never intricate details at any moment. Nothing is planned to the last detail and that’s her achilles heel.

And this is where the quote in her mind comes from. She doesn’t know when and where to start working on her dreams and yet she knows they’re forever valid (which they are and will remain).

You don’t have to doubt yourselves sweetheart. Things will be alright. Trust me they will be because I’ll take care. 😉

Trackbacks & Pingbacks –

Possession

I start my day and the first thing that pops up in my mind – How will it be at office today? Will I get to spend some time with just myself from the schedule or I’d scour the day looking at a black and green screen?

Which one holds more meaning? What is it that I seek in a day that makes it worthwhile? Should I round-up a couple of gangsters and hand them over to cops? Social service – Naaahhh! Whatever they do, it’s their business. I alone can’t make this world a better place but I’ll do whatever I can using my PC. They will pay for their deeds sometime in this life – Karma, remember?

So what do I do? I spend so much time against a screen that I’ve got to find my meaning right here, on this screen. But how do I trigger that sequence that leads me to my purpose everyday?

A friend once asked me – “How did you come to know that you wanted to write? How did you get this wake up call all of a sudden? You never talked about it, said a word about blogging and how did blogging ever make way into your routine?”.

I looked at him blankly and we kept trudging. I’ve since then analyzed my days and activities and come up with the following summary –

My PC gives me all the kicks during the day. It’s my sole connect to the planet. A planet filled with pictures, music, news, and things that build and improve my perception towards life.

So what gives “meaning” to my day? Writing a great piece of code, learn something new in technology, a great blog post, a deep thought, a well narrated story, a beautiful song, heart warming comments from my readers, or a beautiful kiss from my wife. Yes, that’s my answer.

These are things that plant a smile on my face for the rest of the day. My possession. I’m possessed and obsessed by these. These are what make my life what it is now. They are my source of daily inspiration. To keep working hard, trying harder and enjoying success the hardest.

I would never give up on them, will you? What are your possessions?

Mulling and Mauling

I’m all smiles now. After 13 years away from my parents and a lot of struggle to make a living and surviving on it, trying to prove myself in every sphere of life, is it too much to ask for satisfaction?

Not asking for too much, can this perturbed soul be granted freedom? Let some spirit come and take my soul away. Free it. Let it find satisfaction for it is clearly not possible while living on this planet. This isn’t a post in depression but happiness.

For once in my life I imagined a good place, good people, satisfactory job and a happy family. All these days, especially the past few years, I’ve been so busy stabilizing my life from the earlier jolts, that I could only now let my spirit run free and try to look on the other side.

What I live now isn’t too bad. It’s just undisciplined monotony. The one that gives me enough sleeping hours to keep by brain sane. Nothing except that is stable. The list of “must-dos” just doesn’t seem to shorten. The long nights never let an early morning pavé its way into my routine. I’m getting so obsessed with blogging, I keep thinking of things to write about, even in my dreams. And hence the long nights.

Is writing my goal? Not sure but I’m giving it a serious thought these days. I’m not a very versatile writer but am good enough to make a living writing for small town newspapers I guess. Small little things that don’t need heavy-duty vocabulary and as I get better, things could move further. Yes, I’m thinking of an alternate career with no pedigree to show for it. It’ll have to start small, very small. But these are just thoughts.

Then I ought to have kids too. Family’s gonna grow. Wife’s got to have a stable career. And this is when my bubble bursts. Why do I have to think about anything else when I’m already doing pretty good in my current profession? I need something else to do. I’m blogging yes but it isn’t exactly a source of income, is it? I am the lone earner in my family and should I give up on my current income? Do I need a second income? Well, who doesn’t? But how much effort will it be? Will affect my productivity in the better of my jobs?

That brings me to my career. I feel I’m at crossroads and deciding which direction to pursue is giving me a hell of a time.

The Only Thing That Looks Good On Me is You

Fashion? Who decides it? How does it have on and off seasons? There are none for cricket. And for a man who loathes expensive clothing and derides who invest in them, there is a certain irony about it all.

My wife of all people is a fashionista herself. Not that she ever foresaw herself as one. She’s a computer engineer like all of us engineers in our family. But there was always a twinkle in her eyes for colors and style. She would somehow know the current “IN” colors six months ago. She’s a stylist, a concept designer and works with a decent boutique.

Ritika – you are the only one I think about when I hear the word – Fashion.

I am and was a sham when it came to clothing. I look like a bum every time, no matter how hard I try to improve. When it comes to clothing, sadly there was never a statement nor will be.

But as a Mr. Bryan Adams will say – “The Only Thing That Looks Good On Me is You!”. You are my fashion statement!

Here’s the song for you –

Lets see what others think about fashion and such –

My Saviour

You know the moment you really want to cry, it’s filled up in your throat, when the brain thinks you’re gonna go completely deaf from the screams inside your heart and yet you can’t cry? Your lips tremble, your ears, nose and eyes are red but that single tear just doesn’t break out?

You know the best push then is the touch and even better, an embrace from someone whom you know truly loves you. You don’t have to look at anything. All you have to do is close your eyes, feel a touch and it all starts to pour out for you feel safe in the hands of someone you know can hold you when you just can’t trust anyone else to do it.

Thankfully, whenever I’ve been in this kind of soup, I’ve always had that someone. Thank you baby, for when I hear your voice, I know not everything is wrong around me.

You are my saviour. Just be there! 🙂

American Honey Singh

My wife just said this after listening to a Nicky Minaj song – High School ft Lil Wayne… Lil Wayne is the Honey Singh of America!!! Lol

To Home and Back – 4 days full of bliss

Sometimes we just need vacations. To run away from our mundane life and the same fucked up people we meet everyday to meet new ones. I needed this vacation. I was sick and tired of the sickening fucked up home and such life. After all that my wife and I bore together in the past few months, both of us desperately needed a vacation or at bare minimum, a change of location. I had tried applying for vacations twice but one got turned down and the other wasn’t even given a heed in my office. But my last attempt got cleared and 2 days and a weekend was what we had to reboot our heads.

It’d been a long time since my brothers marriage and we hadn’t seen our parents and somewhere deep within our hearts, we owed them a visit. So,we decided to rather see them and save our money than run away to some hill station and spend all that we had saved.

It turned out to be a fantastic decision at the end.

The first day was normal stay at home and we just slept through it. A simple foray into a market and we got my mother her most favorite Pineapple cake. Soft and sumptuous as it was, we just couldn’t resist digging our fingers into it but wait was what was in store for us. We also had to go see my in-laws and once we were late to return from there, my parents had already slept. So tired as we were, a simple hug and a birthday wish was all we could offer her that night before we all slept again.

The next day was packed for activities which included a visit to my parents favorite temple – Mahakaleshwar in Ujjain (M.P.). We woke up and got ready in a haste to reach the temple as early as possible so we don’t get to face the extreme heat. But this was my mum’s birthday and the cake cutting was in order. The cake was duly cut and dug in and she absolutely loved it. We then boarded a taxi and started for our journey. Quite frankly, as you will all see from our faces, we are a family of die-hard foodies. And one particular restaurant “Pappu Da Dhaba” holds special fondness among us. It serves hot breakfast with tea and just totally makes our day with it’s taste. The best part is, it’s located exactly at the half way point between Bhopal and Indore and completely satiates any hunger for the rest of the day. Here is one picture of the route I took with my phone’s camera –

It was a glorious day, bathed in sunshine, with mild heat emanating from the ground, making it so much more comfortable. I hadn’t had a field day in months and I was absorbing all that nature had to offer. We reached Ujjain in around 3.5 hours and headed straight to the temple.

To learn more about Ujjain, please click the link below –

http://ujjaintourism.in/

The temple hosts Lord Shiva in his most glorious of forms. As taking pictures inside the temple isn’t allowed, I couldn’t get any but they certainly are available all over the net. Try and search it out for yourself or visit this site –

http://dic.mp.nic.in/ujjain/mahakal/default.aspx

On normal days, the temple is absolutely packed full of pilgrims at all times but for some strange reason, we were quite early there that day even at 12:30 pm and the temple to our collective sighing souls was fully available for view at our discretion. Here are some pictures we took at the pavement –

This is my family (from the left) – wife, dad and mom!

Indian rituals wherein we tie threads to trees for every prayer or wish we want to come true –

We then went from temple to temple, all of whom held historical significance and here are some pictures from them –

By the time we were done with the 4th temple, moms feet had given away and we decided to direct our journey back for home. It got very cloudy and then rainy by the time we re-crossed the same “Pappu Da Dhaba” but that didn’t deter us from taking a tea break there. Here are some pictures from the way I think are worth noting –

I was surprised to see something that mom and wife had bought right outside the main temple – a Rudraksh that contained nearly all the elements that pertain to Lord Shiva. I think it’s fantastic. I have tried washing them and nothing but some paint has come off it for I just couldn’t believe that something of this sort could exist, so apparently it may be real too –

Coming home, late that evening, I couldn’t help but realize how nature tries and holds it’s course while all that humans do gets dissolved in it. We pollute it and then we preserve it but how it has stayed pure at its roots is something what should teach us – to hold on to our firm pure roots.

The third day was my moms kitty party and oh man – how do us guys then realize that we aren’t even welcome home for those 4 hours. They despise us, hate us and then it’s left up to our better judgement to find a place where we can spend those 4 hours loafering around the city. It was that afternoon that I tasted peppermint right from it’s leaves in a nursery. It was heavenly.

The next evening after a lunch at my in-laws, we left back for Delhi.

I loved the journey and couldn’t help but share it with you guys.

Thanks for reading.

Change

One evening.

Elena said,”I talked to brother Prince today. He asked me to move to Mumbai for a while to give me a change of locality. A fresh locality just might give me some relief from my recurring nightmares from the accident”.

Sam replied,”Even I have thought the same. It’ll freshen you up and keep you away from all the shit you are going through and may even pavé a better way for you to increase your business, Mumbai being the BOLLYWOOD!”

Elena,”Prince said he could look out for a better apartment than the one he now lives in as he could now have a stable house if I am moving in with him. Also as I would move out from Delhi, you could shift to a smaller house and we can save a lot of money from it which could add to our savings. I will take some stuff from here which you won’t need as you would be alone and we can save some money from that too”.

Sam replied,”But you should keep a deadline for yourself. If you aren’t able to do well for yourself by then, you will leave Mumbai and move to our home town and look to set up whatever business you can set up there. You will also then be able to look after both our parents. That way they’ll be happy, you’ll be happy and they’ll also help you manage your financials. But then this is the last option you’ll have. I’m sorry but we can’t afford any more chances after Mumbai for your business to grow up as we’ve failed a lot and it has cost us a lot of money. We need to move on with our life to better pastures”.

Elena replied,”Yeah I second you. If I won’t be able to do it in Mumbai, I guess it’ll be time for me to look for smaller and more beneficial deals than setting up a business from scratch and that way I would get to stay with our parents for a longer period”.

Next noon.

Elena called Sam and screamed,”You know what? Screw that plan. I don’t want to go anywhere. I don’t have any money to settle there and don’t yet have any contacts that can help me start my influence in the industry. I won’t be able to do anything there. I should just probably stay at home and cook food and take care of our home!!!”.

Sam stayed quiet as she hung up the phone.

————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————-

Easier said than done I guess.

Marriage. A bonding of 2 souls. A conjoining of 2 bodies. It’s not a relationship (for relationships are farcical) but a lifelong agreement of two minds to put their own separate interests behind the interests of their unity, health and wealth.

What if the two are going through a phase wherein they are absolutely unable to help one another during the times of dire need? Both of them are helpless, for the world around them is falling apart and yet they refuse to let go of each others hands. They stand committed to die together and willing to make sacrifices not everyone around them would be willing to make. What if the sacrifice pushes them apart for awhile only to get together stronger and start their life on a stronger foothold than the one they previously started on?

Would you allow it or choose the easier option of simply staying together with limited means and with the hope that someday things will get better and they will eventually see a life they had together dreamt of? Shouldn’t we give ourselves enough chances to let us turn color our life in our favorite color?

Solitary Positive

The only solitary positive to have come out of today so far is that my bike got repaired from the permanent damage in the carburetor. The mechanic caught it and asked me to replace it. I said I don’t have enough to buy a new one. So he changed the pump inside it which was way cheaper and my bike now touches 100 kmph at will!

Otherwise, it has been a sad dramatic day so far starting with an anxiety attack on my wife which resulted in her hospitalization at 4 o clock in the morning. She got discharged at 8:30 am but is sleeping after a heavy dose of painkillers and sedatives. I have reached office fully drenched in the most wretched of rains Delhi NCR has faced. It’s cold here and I’m just hoping that this doesn’t aggravate my side sprain right below my right side of the rib cage or run me into fever.

I’m tired frankly and can’t think of writing even one line of code. Sigh!!!

Safety for women

We – both me and my wife had a huge rip off last night for the sheer negligence of her own safety in a city like Delhi. I wasn’t gonna give up this time so I for once raised my voice to let her know that I won’t be having any reasons or arguments regarding the same. My points were as follows:
1. You are wholly and solely responsible for your own safety.
2. No matter how confident you are about the people you are with, there are conditions and situations that won’t remain and are never in your hands to take care off – car accidents for one.
3. Also you never know if your car driver is drunk.
4. I can always tell you that I’m with you always but in reality I’m not and I can’t always be physically.
5. I can’t control your safety if I dont know your whereabouts after a specific interval of time.
6. You have to take your decisions logically because this wicked world won’t spare you even if it knew how excited you are for your job selection.
7. Make sure that you are at home at max by 8:30 pm unless it’s an absolute work emergencyand even that should only extend to 10 pm – the simple reason being you are never sure who ib this world is drinking and driving. For parties I’ll never leave you alone anyways.

Anyone else has any more suggestions?

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